Put your hands behind your head and step away from the oatmeal!
Look at that! We are eating real food :) Well, not quite. According to Mommy anything without salt and butter or olive oil is not exactly real food, but we are definitely making some progress. So far, we seem to be fond of oatmeal, and winter squash. Oh, and we really hate bananas. Yuk!
Although we are not quite ready for intergalactic travel, we can safely continue to explore Boston neighborhoods without freezing off our little tushy. Before it got really cold, we even made it on foot from Belmont to Daddy's job in Central square of Cambridge and back. That's almost 7 miles! Hopefully the cold weather won't keep up indoors now that we have our winter suit.
You are probably wondering why your parents procrastinate writing posts in your blog. Well... the truth is you've been keeping us really busy, kiddo. A lot has been happening in October. We made our first plane trip to visit Grandparents and you even attended your Pra-babushka's (Great-Grandmother's birthday). You had your first laugh, started to grab things, look around, and explore the world. You also
got your first cold, but now you are all better, which makes Mommy and Daddy very relieved. All this has been keeping us nice and busy ;)
But we finally got around to posting some pictures on the web.
There are some very cute ones of you dressed as a pumpkin for Halloween. We didn't exactly go trick or treating because Mommy is anti-candy (at least for children with no teeth), but we did take a walk around MtAuburn cemetery, which is really gorgeous this time of year, but if you want, you can pretend it's spooky.
A huge thank you goes to Babulya for getting us a pumpkin outfit. If it was left up to Mommy, we'd wear the same thing every day and wouldn't be nearly as cute. But between Zia Gaia bringing us baby fashions from Italy (there is a picture of you in little cow jammies in the album above), and Grandmothers dressing you up, you are looking like one hot babe :)
Love,
-Mommy and Daddy
We just finished the 6 weeks of our first playgroup at Isis. It was probably more of a playgroup for me than Sammy. At 1-2 months, our babies were only old enough to nurse, poop, and sleep, but all the moms had a great time. We also learned a lot about how to take care of our babies and exchanged the tips we picked up over the first few months. Here are some pictures of our little group.
I also taught my first class this weekend. Things went surprisingly smoothly, so I guess I didn't have to panic that much. Babulya came to visit and took care of Sammy while I was shopping and making handouts on friday, and on saturday during class Sammy had whole 2 adults taking care of her (Babulya and Daddy). It reminded me of the Russian proverb "7 nannies have a kid without an eye," but since we had only 2 nannies, no harm came to Sammy.
We also took some good pictures this weekend.
When you were 7 weeks old, you were already becoming a party animal. One day, you'll read this post and find out that my 30th birthday was the first party of your life.
I was suspecting something fishy when I walked up the stairs of Zia Gaia's house. Babulya i Dedulya were visiting us for a few days and Gaia invited us all to her house for a "baby" brunch. Don't worry, kiddo. A baby brunch is not where you eat babies. It's where you meet babies :) Her friend Kate just had a baby boy a week after you were born, and I thought we were getting together to meet him. But as I walked into the dining room, my mouth dropped. Guess whom I saw -- your Great-Grandma. And your uncle Leo, and aunt Megan, and your Grandma Louise. What a surprise -- particularly Great-Grandma. I was so looking forward to have her meet you. She just had a surgery 2 months ago, and I didn't hope in my wildest dreams that she'd come, but she did. She is a real trouper, and nothing could keep her away from you. As I hugged everyone, tears came to my eyes. I found your Dad's eye, grinning and also wet.
Since we decided not to go to France this fall, your Dad decided to bring France to me. Aunt Megan and uncle Leo made France themed decorations, and your Daddy slaved over baguettes and tomato onion tarts the day before in 90F heat. I thought he was crazy! Even an obsessive cook like me wouldn't consider baking in such heat. Babulya was making bayalda (an eggplant dish) and piroshki. She also brought some caviar for a little Russian touch. Everyone was making so much stuff, I simply backed out of the kitchen and didn't go there until it was time for dinner. I kept giving them a hard time with going so overboard for a simple potluck lunch. When I finally dared to come into my sacred territory (one day you'll share a kitchen with me and realize that it's no picnic ;), I just couldn't contain myself. Every board was dirty. The counters were overflowing and the heat was unbelievable. I am sweating just remembering it. What can I say -- I am a little Soup Nazi. Wait, you don't know about Soup Nazi yet. But I am sure that by the time you are old enough to read this, you'll be old enough to be initiated into the wonderful world of Seinfeld. Anyway... So besides cooking and baking, your poor Dad and Babulya had the hard job of calming me down. Well, they did a great job with it all. It wasn't long before I started laughing at the whole situation and they even took over the job of making dinner to help me relax. I don't deserve such an awesome family -- really, I don't!
I've never felt as complete and happy on any other birthday in my life. Just watching your Great-Grandmother (Prababushka) holding you for the first time was enough to make my heart melt. That's just how I wanted to spend my birthday. No restaurants, no big crowds, just family (Zia Gaia and Zio Jerome count as family :)
[Sammy meets Grandma Louise for the first time]
[Sammy meets Great-Grandma Aleksandra for the first time]
After lunch, the heat really got to us, and we headed over to Waltham where out of town family were staying. We had cake and sat around talking while you took a nap. Eventually, it was time to head home, but celebration wasn't over. The next day, your Dad took us all to Isabella Stewart Gardner's Museum for lunch. He knew that I was hoping to go there for your baby shower and since it didn't work out then, he arranged for the 10 of us to have lunch in their garden on my birthday. You were amazing the entire 2 days and joined in all the fun. You started smiling right around that weekend. You probably didn't know what you were smiling about yet, but maybe you'll read this post some day and it will make you smile again.
Love, hugs, and kisses,
-Mommy
Well, since we'd like to have more kids some day, I thought I'll write down some of the lessons I've learned from this breastfeeding experience. In a few years I might forget the important details and it would be nice if the second time it went a little better.
You are going to be 5 weeks old tomorrow and you are growing to be a beauty already. Your cheeks are starting to look like little peaches and your eye lashes are getting long. Just want you to know that you've been the most amazing baby. You eat really well, you make lovely big poops, and you even sleep at night for 4-5 hours straight! You and I have been chatting a lot about the whole feeding thing while sitting there on the blue couch trying to work things out. But I figure you probably won't remember any of our chats. That's why I am writing you this letter. One day, you'll be old enough to read it.
There is this altar we call motherhood. I think women's brains are hard-wired to bring sacrifices on it to ensure their babies grow up to be healthy, happy, and successful. We try to give you the best food, send you to the best school, make sure you end up going to Harvard, and settle for nothing but the best flower arrangements for your wedding. We obsess about these things as if they make all the difference, and if we settle for less than perfection, we think we've ruined your whole life and failed as mothers. The very first of these tests comes in the form of milk and the most important decision of our parenting career so far has been whether to breastfeed you or give you formula.
Yes, breastfeeding is the gold standard for baby nutrition. It's the most perfect food. Unfortunately, life is not always perfect and there is no such thing as a free lunch even when it's baby's lunch. The question we have to answer now is whether this perfection is worth the lofty price. Up until now, I was afraid to even pronounce the F word. I was determined to breastfeed you. When I heard that both of your grandmothers had a hard time with this oh-so-natural task, I decided to get as much education and help as necessary to make it happen. I took a breastfeeding class a few weeks before you were born, I saw 3 lactation consultants in the hospital during your first 2 days of life. I've joined a lactation support group for Moms like me who just weren't getting it right, and when all else failed I've seen one of the best lactation consultants in Boston from 3 private sessions. The most important thing everyone tried to teach me is that you absolutely must breastfeed even if your breasts fall off. The first thing they told us in the breastfeeding class is that you can't go into it with an attitude that you'll *try* to breastfeed. You have to think that you *will* breastfeed. Trust me, I really was going to breastfeed you until you were 1 years old. But after trying the ice, the heat, the tea bags, lanolin, nipple butter, prescription nipple ointment, and pumping, my breasts are still in bad shape. At first, we used to think it's the latch. We've made great progress on that since the beginning -- the left breast is doing pretty well, and the right breast is at least a little better now that I started using the prescription ointment. But the plugged ducts and pores aren't getting better no matter what. We also have the problem of the right breast squirting straight into your little mouth, which I am sure is not much fun. You usually start frowning and squirming whenever I give you that breast. The good news is that you are doing well and gaining weight, though Dr. Kerbel thinks you could be gaining a little more. Seems like I just barely have enough milk and it always makes me panic that you'll be hungry and I'll have nothing to give you.
The worst part of all this is that I've been hanging in there between the states of slight discomfort (on really good days) and pretty strong pain. As much as I try to handle all this gracefully, I've been one very stressed Mommy lately, and this has been hard on everyone. You get edgy when you feel that I am stressed, and Daddy found us both in tears a number of times when he got home from work. So the bottom line is that as wonderful as breastfeeding can be, it's making the mental health of our whole family go down the toilet. So for the first time, we are considering gradually switching you to formula. Whether we'll do it or not, I just want you to know that you are the most important person in our life and we only want what's best for you. We just figured that having a sane and cheerful Mommy is more important than a few more antibodies you could get from my milk.
I am starting to come to terms with the fact that I will not be a perfect parent. And that's ok. Your Dad always told me that no parents are perfect, and somehow kids turn out just fine. He is really wise your Dad. One day, you'll be able to talk to him, and you'll find out that he is the coolest guy ever! But this parenting imperfection is hard for me to accept. I am a perfectionist. I know that this is not the first decision I'll struggle with. I'll probably drive us all nuts about what school you should go to and which AP classes you should take. That's why kids get 2 parents -- to keep things balanced. I'll finish up now because you are about to wake up, and I'll get to hold you, cuddle you, and feed you.
With all my love, hugs, and kisses,
-Your Mommy
There is nothing better than being a Grandparent -- you get all the fun with no responsibility. My parents have been awaiting grandparenthood for so long that they could barely contain themselves when they walked through the door on July 26. Their excitement couldn't even be compared to a 5-year-old opening his Christmas gifts.
I think Samantha took after me in her inability to stay home and enjoy a quiet life. She is the calmest when we go on walks and little car trips (and so am I :)
This weekend was very eventful. On saturday we went on 3 outings! We started our day with a walk around Fresh Pond. Jason jogged around the pond, and then joined us for another 1-2 mile walk. I was excited to find a newly paved bike trail that's nice and smooth, but Samantha didn't like it -- she is a bumpy girl. So we first walked on an old woodsy trail that provided plenty of rocking to put her to sleep and then switched to the smooth trail where I could push the stroller without much difficulty.
The second outing was to Waltham. We stopped by Domenic's for lunch and had our usual -- panino tonno and panino melanzane (tuna and eggplant sandwiches). I think they are the best kept outdoor dining secret in Boston and on saturday it was nice and quiet without all the office crowds. That was Samantha's first lunch out. I can't wait for the day when she can taste those sandwiches! Since we were already in Waltham, we decided to stop by the farmer's market to pick up some veggies to bring to Katya and Tolya's BBQ. This was our first get together since their twin boys, Dima and Sasha, and our little girl Samantha were born. When I told my Mom about the plans for the BBQ, she laughed. "I can totally see how this is gonna go -- you and Katya will nurse and change diapers the whole time and Dima and Jason will grill and eat." To tell you the truth that's what I expected too, but it actually went much better than we could even imagine. When we arrived, Tolya was feeding the boys from the bottle and Samantha was sleeping, so Katya and I got to grill. Then all the adults got to eat in surprising peace. Samantha woke up just as I was finishing up and joined the eating crowd. It felt good to be with people as I was nursing her. I know that most Moms love this private time between them and their babies, but 8 hours of private time every day is a bit much for me. I am slowly learning how to breastfeed her in public so that we don't have to sit at home all the time. Jason did the honor of changing diapers, which he is becoming a real expert at.
As you can imagine the conversation revolved around babies. It was great to swap tips with parents who are going through the same stage as we are. Katya showed me how to swaddle Samantha correctly, which has been helping a great deal.
It was hard to believe, but we were actually less tired after 3 outings than after staying home all day.
Sunday morning was much harder. We had lots of home errands and Samantha was getting restless. We were also attempting to cut her fingernails for the first time with no success. We bought baby nail clippers, but neither one of us was used to using clippers because we use scissors on our own nails and she was squirming like crazy. We finally gave up and decided to wait until she falls asleep. The problem was that she can't fall asleep until we swaddle her, which makes finger nail trimming a bit difficult. That's when Zia Gaia came to the rescue. We went out for coffee, which put Samantha nicely to sleep in her stroller. When we got back, I left her in her car seat (which unclips from the stroller), and cut her finger nails with my regular manicure scissors. Then Gaia showed me how to file them to make them smooth (as you can see I am somewhat manicurely challenged). Samantha slept through the whole thing! Thus passed our first girls day out -- with coffee and manicure :)
Here she is sleeping. Her hair got all fussy and I thought she looked like baby Einstein. Either that or the Little Prince.
On friday, I called the nurses' station of Mount Auburn hospital in tears. My breasts hurt so badly, it felt as if needles were being stuck into them each time I sat down to breast feed. Up to this point we got more advice about breast feeding than we knew what to do with. Every nurse and lactation consultant in the hospital seemed to have an opinion on pretty much everything (from latch, to positions, to frequency of feedings), and no one agreed on anything. Wake her up every two hours. No, let her sleep. Feed until she lets go off the breast herself. No wonder your breasts hurt, you shouldn't feed for more than 20 minutes. You might feel some pain during latch on. You shouldn't feel any pain at all. Let your nipples air dry. Cover them immediately and put on a bra.
Thank goodness that in the middle of all this pain and confusion, one midwife, Sharon, gave me the best advice I've gotten on breast feeding so far. "Only listen to one person." She recommended I go see a lactation consultant for a real consultation rather than 5 minute ones I've been getting in the hospital. "Beth at Isis Maternity is very good," added Sharon. We called Isis and luckily got an appointment for the same day.
After taking a look at my cracked and bitten breasts, Beth put a finger in Sammy's month and got her to suck. "Aha!" she said. "She pulls her tongue back and this makes her bite you. Don't worry -- we'll retrain her," she said. I was wondering how one can train a 1 week old. "Before each feeding, let her suck on your finger for a minute and press her little tongue down. Then let her take the breast, but if she is still biting, stop and relatch her. You have what she wants. Trust me, she'll learn very fast." We practiced with Beth for 30 minutes or so, and I got more comfortable with latching Sammy on correctly. The hard part was getting it right every time.
When we got home, Jason was my coach. He sat next to me for at least 5 feedings constantly bugging me: "Does it hurt?" If I was quiet, her knew it did. "Unlatch her. Do it again." I felt so terrible constantly taking the breast away from my poor little baby. "But she doesn't know she is hurting me. I feel like I am torturing her," I said. "Helen," said my wise husband, "It's just like when she'll go on her first date and forget to call. You'll be worried sick, even though she didn't mean to hurt you. It's not her fault, but we have to teach her how to do it right." Have I told you yet that I married the most amazing man? Well, I did. He made Sammy suck on his finger and keep her tongue down. He held her little hands so that I could see what I was doing during latch on. And he asked me a million times, "How does it feel?" It only took 1 days for me to look back at him with tears of joy rather than pain and confidently say, "It feels good!"
I now look forward to feeding my little hungry hippo. She looks like a Pooh Bear with plump rosy cheeks, and every time her mouth starts making little smacking sounds, I know it's time for a little something.
